


Disgraced Prince

by EriiErii



Series: Kiransona Collection [1]
Category: Fire Emblem Heroes, Fire Emblem Series
Genre: Arguing, Canon Divergence, Dark Past, Multi, Original Character(s), Past Character Death, Past Relationship(s), Polyamory, Self-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-02
Updated: 2020-03-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:48:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22992709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EriiErii/pseuds/EriiErii
Summary: With the help of his lovers, Lif tried to pick up the pieces to take up a new life and atone for himself, after he was set free from Hel's control. Though he shared gratitude for finding love again, there remains the matter of what to do with the family he still has in this new version of Askr. What would Alfonse or Sharena think if they knew who he really was? And after catching their attention in his first act of atonement, what would the queen and king of Askr think of him?
Relationships: Camilla/Líf (Fire Emblem), Camilla/Ryoma (Fire Emblem), Camilla/Summoner | Eclat | Kiran, Líf/Camilla/Ryoma/Summoner | Eclat | Kiran, Líf/Ryoma (Fire Emblem), Líf/Summoner | Eclat | Kiran, Ryoma/Summoner | Eclat | Kiran
Series: Kiransona Collection [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1652392
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	Disgraced Prince

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! For post updates, questions, art and general random silliness in between, check me out at eriisaam.tumblr.com for more!

He came to this Askr with a set mission. Once there, however, he already lost his focus, and the original plan went completely off the rails of what Hel hoped.

His first mistake was being too anxious. Hel’s plan was to use Lif and Thrasir more to spy on her enemies and gather intel, rather than to mount an attack just yet. The barrier still remained between the realm of the living and the dead, and the original plan was to wait for the right time to break the barrier before causing total war with the living. 

Back then, his and Thrasir’s minds were so heavily consumed. He still wasn’t entirely sure what the true cause was be it grief, or the erosion of their free wills under Hel’s contract as the cohorts she transformed them into. He was fully compliant to the plan, knowing that the sooner everyone were killed, the sooner they would reach their goal of restoring their original Askr and Embla. Everything could go back to normal. He could’ve seen  _ her _ again…

He wound up so eager to the plan as to be  _ too _ eager. He was far more desperate and anxious than Hel anticipated, and so while she had Thrasir and Eir to focus on, he moved out of her range and took his own initiative. In hindsight, he wondered if it was the last shred of sanity pioneering him at the time while he still had it.

What made his resolve falter was seeing the summoner again, especially with Ryoma with her. His grief overtook him once more, and while they initially traded words and blows in his lingering resentments from the fall of his Askr, one moment of carelessness on Ryoma’s part was all it took to change so much.

It all began with pain, confusion and fear. He was so certain beforehand what his goal was, but after that one mistake, he was suddenly freed from Hel’s control, and he felt as if a heavy fog was lifted from his mind. All at the cost of his body transforming even further than what being a cohort already did to him. 

But as bleak as it all felt to him at the time, it was the best outcome for him, even if he didn’t think such at the moment. He learned to regain control of himself until he could be restored to his form before Hel corrupted him. He held full control of his body and soul again, in ways Hel could no longer reach him or recapture him. 

More importantly… he found love again. More than he was expecting, in fact…

He wouldn’t pretend that love could undo all his pain, however. Even regaining a human form, the darkened patches under his eyes, the faded tones of his highlights, and the corpse-like tones of his skin served as a glaring reminder he was Lif, not Alfonse. Even when he suddenly found himself with people loving and supporting him now, it didn’t erase the memories of the Askr he failed or the versions of them he lost.

But even if he couldn’t change the past, he could still atone. He  _ would _ atone. It became his new vow to his lovers. It was his contract he made to his summoner that Hel couldn’t take away from him. Not again.

But while he had his new goal for where to take his sudden new life, that wasn’t to say that such a life came easy, or his sudden shift in alliance was handled all that smoothly with the Order of Heroes.

His introduction to the Order of Heroes was specifically with the summoner, Ryoma and Camilla. Even as Alfonse, Anna and Sharena varied on how high their suspicions spiked, or how strongly they worried at news of Erin and her party getting caught in an ambush, Erin was the quickest to intercept them and try to ease their fears, but also redirect attention away from the unfortunate mishap between him, Ryoma and Camilla. So long as their summoner proved herself to be fine, they tried to take her word for it in trusting her judgement over the safety of her, Ryoma and Camilla, but Alfonse stressed the most of still wanting a much more thorough explanation beyond "we're fine" later on. It bought them time not to have to explain to them why there were suddenly three newly awakened manaketes around, but he also knew that eventually, they would have to know about him no matter what form he took anymore.

By then, they were all well acquainted with a dragon stone each. Initially, Erin wanted to tackle the subject of both him and the dragon stones, but she saw through his reluctance no matter how hard he tried to hide his concerns with what he thought was a neutral look.

Then again, could he really be that surprised? She was just as able to read this world's Alfonse as she was of him. He just wished he learned sooner not to take such for granted for so long. With a huff, he wondered if she and the Alfonse of this world ever reconciled, or if the two still remained just friends even then. There were just enough differences this time around that made him wonder.

"Hey, Lif…?"

Right then, Erin caught him in a time he kept his distance. Between her, Ryoma and Camilla, they understood enough of where his feelings really stood deep down, which was also what led to them nudging Erin to speak to him alone, as not to overwhelm him. 

He had already guessed what she probably wanted to say, and she was certainly justified, but even still, he showed his hesitance even just in the act to turn and look at her. 

She still had her hood up right then, and obscured much of her head except her mouth. Like always. It's funny how something he was so used to seeing as Alfonse was making him feel somewhat tense now, even if he knew then  _ and _ now what her reasons were for doing this.

"Are you ok?" He watched her move to sit next to him, taking a chance when he didn't reject her outright. He was vaguely aware of Ryoma and Camilla in the next room over, but heard enough that they were busy talking to one another over listening in on them.

"...Is this really ok?" He finally tried to engage a little.

"Is it really all that different from all the other times we've seen multiple versions of the same hero around here? Like how you seem to know two Ryomas, for instance." She reached over to rub his back, but Lif barely budged an inch from it. "I'm sure Alfonse and Sharena would understand, too. And Anna would know how it feels especially."

"...That's not quite… Haa, no, nevermind…"

He saw Erin shift around until the two were facing each other. Even with the hood obscuring much of her face, he could tell she was looking at him in a way to try to coax him to open up more of what was weighing so heavily on his mind. It's funny how so little of her face could say so much even when obscured by that hood.

That damned annoying hood.He wanted to be so selfish at times even as Alfonse to just tear that thing off and see his summoner back then, but he had more self-restraint than to just catch Erin off guard like that.

But… Even if he wouldn't dream of being that rash even now, he already felt so selfish taking so much from a world he was earlier so damn set to destroy. Was it ok to be just a little more selfish even still? 

Before he could help himself, he realized too late he had his hand up to Erin's face. The eerily cold chill of his skin greedily drank her body heat, yet instead of pushing him away, he was torn of what to feel when Erin not only still let him touch her, but she even nuzzled her cheek into his hand. He still needed time to get used to how much Erin, Ryoma and Camilla welcomed him in so readily.

"...Could you take that off?" He at least didn't act on it right away, but he eventually moved his hand off her cheek to feel the edge of the hood's fabric along his fingertips, redirecting Erin's attention to it. 

Maybe he  _ was _ being just a little more selfish. And with how Erin sighed, but slipped the hood back, maybe he was ok to be. 

She saw the way his demeanor changed so much right then. She saw the contrast between the tired yet resolved, cold face the swordsman would wear on the surface, versus how now he seemed meek, timid, lost and shy to ask even for the little things deep down. It might've been his fears to open again just to lose it all once more, but that rare vulnerability reminded her how much Lif definitely used to be Alfonse once.

He saw how such a little gesture mattered more to him than to her. She may not remember it this time, but the first time he saw what she looked like without her hood, it was when she was dying. He studied the contrast between the time he saw her life fading away from her eyes to how vibrantly even such darkened grey tones could shine now.

He didn't even remember pulling Erin close to him. It didn't occur to him how long he held her either. All he thought about was how Erin let him, and how he was vaguely aware of her shushing him or rubbing his back more.

Maybe tonight, he could be just a little more selfish and vulnerable. Erin seemed to try to ease him to it, anyways, and he just felt too exhausted to try anymore that night otherwise, as weak as he felt. Tomorrow, he would try a little harder to put his best foot forward facing his own family… or himself.

* * *

Emphasis on 'tried.'

Conveniently, an opportunity lined up that day to prepare himself. Unfortunately, while Erin was all too happy to try to salvage what little part of 'Alfonse' remained in Lif's withered, grief-stricken soul, she might've done so a bit too well...

_ Originally, _ what she had in mind was to try to ease Lif with Anna, Sharena and especially Alfonse. They had yet to see him in any capacity, and she was thrilled of the happy accident working out for them of introducing a seemingly normal, if sickly-looking and tired out swordsman, rather than to try to explain why they shouldn't be afraid of a swordsman who alternatively, fully exposed his ribcage, was glowing ominously, or would've otherwise made Alfonse question just how drunk Erin was at the time to insist he was harmless, or how similarly tipsy Camilla and Ryoma had to be to agree.

When Lif's mind wasn't so clouded by Hel or his own grief, however, he went back to similar habits Alfonse had of trying to scope out the situation and plan. Unlike Alfonse, however, he had the advantage of foresight. He realized, between context clues, his own observations, or otherwise, that they have yet to learn about Nifl or Muspell. Last time, he remembered that by the time they had, Surtr had already caused considerable amounts of damage to Askr just to announce his presence with, to say nothing of Fjorm or her mother. And as much as he knew there were slight differences between his time and this one - between Ryoma's and Erin's involvement with Camilla that wasn't there before, or his presence alongside Alfonse, but in his shift of focus to try to come to terms with the loss of his Askr and the acceptance of this one - he felt more inspired than wary of the kind of power this hindsight gave him.

If this world could allow such changes, and if Ryoma agreed and encouraged him to take what he could of his new life here, then what if the differences he made here went a bit further? It was better than Hel's idea to power herself with two worlds' worth of deaths, he realized now, but he tried not to dwell on the mistakes of his past desperations.

So, as Erin went to speak to the Order of Heroes, pioneered with her initial thoughts to at least ease the group to Lif before dropping the news of who he really was, the plan came quickly undone when she couldn't seem to find Lif, and for that matter, neither could Ryoma or Camilla. 

"Lif?... As in the first king of Askr, Lif?" In her scrambling to find Lif, she inevitably blurted his name out to Alfonse. While Anna was busy at the time with her briefings with Askran soldiers elsewhere, Erin unfortunately had Sharena and Alfonse follow her in her search. Ever the skeptic, Alfonse also wasn't one to just leave this alone either.

"Well, kinda!" As ill-equipped as she was to explain right then, she knew it would only work up Alfonse more to drop the subject, as much as she wanted to. "Look, it's complicated, and I kinda wanna go over the specifics later, but back then he was the one we ran into, and he's kinda-"

_ "Lif ambushed you?!" _

_ "It's not as bad as that, Alfonse!" _

"Wait, but isn't King Lif dead by now…? Oh! Unless…! Erin, did you summon him, then~?"

"Yeeeennnooooo…? ...ish…?"

Erin knew she already dug herself into quite a hole as it was with the siblings, but then as she found Anna, she thought she had the perfect opportunity to escape from this.

"Oh good, you're all here. I'm glad there's  _ some _ good luck in today after all, cuz we got some problems."

"Commander? What happened?"

"I'll brief you on the heavier details on the way, but to put a long story short, there's some kind of strange undead manakete rampaging near Gnótthæð."

Erin briefly bit the inside of one of her cheeks. Naaaah, surely it wasn't…

"...Was it black and blue and glowy all over?"

"It… That's a fairly apt summary of what our troops reported, yes."

Well,  _ shit. _

"...  _ Erin. What's going on?" _

"Let's just grab Ryoma and Camilla first and we'll get to that point on the way, Alfonse…"

To Erin's dismay, Lif was even better at digging his own holes than she was.

Gnótthæð was a prosperous farmland in Askr. As Lif distinctly remembered, when Surtr first tried to announce his presence and declare war on Askr, he made an example out of both the lands and its people by setting everything and everyone on fire. Even the troops who would've reported the massacre were burnt within an inch of their lives, and barely survived long enough to get their reports to Anna. Just beyond that, he and Loki would've intercepted Fjorm and her mother, and while Fjorm survived, he would've tortured the queen to death right in front of her.

If Lif was going to prove his newfound resolve, he may as well start with Gnótthæð. He wasn't about to forget so easily of Surtr's rite granting him Muspell's Flame, or how he still couldn't rush out and kill him even if he hadn't already given his world's Breidablik to Erin, but for what he  _ could _ do, it was just enough to save the villagers and buy Fjorm and her mother more time.

He took the water blessings he hoarded in his convoy to imbue himself with just enough power to offset the flames. Even if he couldn't kill Surtr, he could certainly do enough to him to make him think twice. 

He rushed on ahead to Gnótthæð and drove the villagers there out of their lands and homes. What initially began as an attempt to be diplomatic and order them to evacuate ended with him losing patience in the face of their skepticism when Surtr’s forces were on the rise, and so he lost his patience just enough to expose his inhuman qualities before embracing such and transforming in full to terrify them out instead.

However, driving them out a distance from their homelands was just a precaution. He valued their lives, but he also was just as keen to protect the land itself. Whether or not he could do so, at least he did what he could to give himself a bit of insurance. He ran off to try to cut Surtr off enroute to the farmlands over wait for him. The moment Lif saw the familiar Muspellian king, it was as if a deeper instinct awoken and overtook him. It was vaguely similar to how Hel took over him and pulled the strings that bound his broken mind. Except instead of Hel this time, now he knew it was by his own instinct from all the outrage and grief pent up as the memories of his failures overtook him. 

He remembered the glimpse he caught of what remained of queen Eliva. He remembered how Fjorm was also in such terrible condition herself that she barely survived her own encounter. He remembered what the Rite of Frost and the Rite of Flame took from either royal families, and how helpless he felt as Alfonse when the best he could do were risky ploys to divert and lessen Surtr's damage when he couldn't directly stop him. Maybe this time was hardly different in that sense, but in the grand scheme of things, he knew he was having  _ some _ impact this time around. He vaguely remembered nearly shredding Loki to pieces when she barely moved out of the way of his rampage, and he gave Veronica enough pause and headache to back off sooner likewise with Xander. 

Past that, everything else was a blur. He remembered vaguely hearing shouting, but didn't stop to consider the cause.

"Lif…!"

And he didn't stop trying to pursue Surtr or attack whatever stood in his way otherwise, even as he felt slower and sluggish somehow. The only thing to get through to him was a single voice calling out to him.

_ "Lif stop!" _

It was Erin. Her voice grew loud and firm the more she tried to call out to him. Eventually, her persistence won out, and he was able to snap out of his earlier haze to focus on her. He saw the way she noticed his eyes and how it told her enough she had him back. Despite Alfonse and Anna frantically calling Erin and trying to discourage her from getting too close to him, she ignored them in favor of running up to meet him.

But while her trust in him was well-placed, and the dragon hummed softly to coo at her, he suddenly felt an intense wave of dizziness overwhelm him, and he slowly lowered himself while swaying in place to counteract his sudden vertigo. At first, he thought it was an adrenaline crash from the way he worked himself up so heavily moments ago, right up until he started tensing and wincing on his way to lay completely down when all his pain returned to him in full force.

"Lif, it'll be ok. Stay down and rest, ok?" He noticed how much Erin tried to keep his attention on her, and it didn't go past him how much she kept holding his cheek and turning his head back to face her whenever he tried to look back to his body. Despite her efforts, it confirmed enough to him he was not only indeed wounded after all, but her worry convinced him the damage was heavy. He remained calm in laying and curling beside her while he felt her pour vulneraries on his body to start healing and numbing his pain. He growled in his throat and dug his claws into the ground when he felt Erin pull something out of his wound, but as the Order of Heroes watched it all in concern and caution, Lif still made no effort to attack Erin or prove hostile otherwise.

Even so, he growled, but kept his head low when he noticed an Askran soldier go against Anna's or Alfonse's orders and try to run up to him with a wyrmslayer.

_ "Stand.  _ **_Down._ ** _ " _

Only to stop when Camilla proved much more proactive in warding him off. Immediately, her wyvern landed right in front of him and cut his path off to Lif. Even as Camilla dismounted off her wyvern, having little intention to sick the undead creature on him, she still had her axe in hand that said enough she wouldn't let this stand either.

"B-by order of his majesty, King Gustav, I have-"

"To turn around and back away." Her tone was sharp in immediately finishing his declaration for him and dismissing him. She wasn't in the best mood in the first place, and less so to even take the time to tease or mask her outrage like usual. "It would, after all, be such a  _ shame _ to report to the rest of Nohr that a single soldier is responsible for declaring Askr as our enemy, wouldn't it?"

Alfonse and Anna immediately tensed at Camilla's threat. Erin, by contrast, merely huffed in partially listening to her, but mostly focusing on tending to Lif's wounds. The soldier's eyes widened, and the declaration made him take pause of his plan. Clearly, he dreaded the idea of going against Gustav's orders, but he was even more panicked at the thought of causing a massive political rift to do it.

Of course, Camilla wasn't  _ quite _ genuinely quick to declare war on anything and anyone she disagreed with, and for that matter neither was Xander, but this soldier proved himself well enough not to know that. And even if Alfonse and Anna knew the truth, it hardly did much to ease their anxieties of how flippant she was of such a threat.

Still, it was just enough to make the soldier stand down.

"Smart boy. I'll put in a good word to your king." And she followed suit in tucking her axe away in her convoy in favor of her stave as she made her way to Erin.

"Lif, you have to be more mindful of your health! I warned you before about that! And look at these burns, lay low the rest of the day, will you?!" 

Lif didn't protest. He was far from the best person to protest between Erin's concerns proving sound and Lif's wounds proving why. He was made aware that in the time he was fighting, he was stabbed a few times, had at least three arrows, two lances, and a sword as souvenirs, and he was burned in multiple places, yet miraculously, not at his head or wings. To say Erin and especially Camilla weren’t impressed was an understatement, and the way their glares burned in him was more painful than the wounds he suffered, especially now that he was numb to them mid-healing.

He heard raised voices and stared toward the source, paying attention just well enough to notice Anna verbally chewing out the soldier, but not enough to notice the exact words. Rather, he focused on Camilla and Erin, biding his time for when he could have the strength to transform back into a human form. The more he focused, the more he heard how much Anna and Alfonse varied on how calm or heated they were in debating the soldier long after Camilla stopped paying any mind to him. He vaguely heard distant wingbeats from above, but didn’t stop to look up in favor of trying to regain his nerves just enough to focus on transforming.

“Are all of you alright?! Did you find the-... th… a-are you….?”

And he immediately regretted his timing.

The wingbeats were from Ryoma’s kinshi. Ryoma showing up wouldn’t have been such a big deal, but he wasn’t alone. Just as Lif collapsed on his hands and knees, feeling exhaustion overtake him even after he was fully healed, he looked up just in time for him and Sharena to lock eyes for just a moment too long than he liked. Even when it was brief, he saw enough to recognize what was running in Sharena’s mind. What stood out to her was Lif’s looks once she finally saw him after having only Erin’s words of him to go by. For what she assumed was her ancestor, she wasn’t quite so prepared to notice just how striking his similarities to Alfonse were, despite there clearly being just enough differences to still set the two apart. He saw the gears clearly turning, and he couldn’t help but wonder if maybe Sharena was starting to catch on to who he really was.

“Are all of you alright? ...Lif?  _ Lif!” _

Unfortunately, he couldn’t stay focused. He saw Ryoma try to approach him when Sharena hesitated, but the samurai’s image blurred, and in spite of Lif’s stubbornness, he vaguely saw Ryoma’s form move closer before he himself fainted.

* * *

By the time Lif came to, he was no longer out in the fields. As he shut his eyes again to clear his vision and refocus, he took in the sight that he had since been taken to another room somewhere. Whether this was the infirmary, or back in his home dormitory with his lovers, he wasn’t entirely certain.

“O-oh… Oh! You’re awake! Look! He’s awake~!”

The only confirmation he had that he was definitely in the infirmary after all was in the form of finding out Sharena was there with him. Her words were loud and clear compared to the muttering and still-muffled words of the rest of the room, but he could vaguely recognize one other voice at least included Alfonse, among a few others. As he shifted to sit up, he felt someone grab him and partially help him the rest of the way in sitting up. Looking to his side, it turned out to be Ryoma, and with Sharena drawing attention to him, he saw Erin and Camilla follow suit to check and dote on him while Anna and Alfonse watched. He could see Alfonse wasn’t entirely thrilled of Sharena being right by his side, but Lif hesitated to draw more attention to how he noticed. (It’s not like he could blame him, after all…)

“At ease, Lif. Don’t try to get up too fast, take your time.” Ryoma had a point, and Lif could feel his hold was firm enough to tell him Ryoma only trusted him to sit up and little more, at least as a start. For now, Lif didn’t protest it, but only because he has a much more pressing concern.

“Did they make it…?”

“Who?” He had everyone’s attention, but out of everyone, Erin spoke up to press him a little. It took Lif a moment to remind himself they didn’t know of them as well as he had.

“Fjorm… Her and her mother… Are they safe? And what of Gnótthæð…? Are the farmlands and its people safe…?”

“Oh Lif… Even with such terrible wounds, you’re still willing to throw yourself at risk for others… It would ease our hearts if you were at least not so callous with your own life while doing so, darling. You nearly gave poor Erin and I quite the fright to heal you…!” And while there was some sense of teasing in Camilla’s voice and tone, it just barely masked the serious weight of her words and how she clearly wasn’t as amused of his stunt as she tried to make it seem. From how Ryoma and Erin seemed just as tense, if not arguably worse than Camilla in hiding such, they both clearly agreed.

“Please… I need to know…” He knew he wasn’t exactly in the right, but he continued to stress his question more. For where he tried to cause worse harm to this world originally, he wanted to at least make a difference this time. 

“Oh you… Yes! Princess Fjorm and Queen Eliva are safe~! While I was flying with Ryoma, both of us spotted them trying to flee past Gnótthæð’s fields. They were very shaken up, but we gave them a quick look-over before Ryoma had his retainers guide them the rest of the way back in here!” 

“Mmhmm. Saizo and Kagero reported they safely arrived here as well, and last I was informed, they both seem to be conversing with King Gustav and Queen Henriette of their current situation between Nifl and Muspell.”

However, as much as Sharena tried to be gentle and encouraging in her attempts to reassure Lif, and Ryoma fully supported proving her point as well, the two didn’t notice the way Alfonse was staring at Lif for quite some time, as if studying him. Although Anna was either much less intense (or much more subtle) by comparison, she also seemed to have a similar idea as Alfonse, or at least was starting to suspect something in the ways she looked between him and Lif a few times.

“And the people seem safe too, if still a bit shaken up.” Erin also tried to add to the report, particularly when she noticed Alfonse and Anna didn’t. “I guess I can’t blame them between sudden fires and having a weird, glowing dragon chase them out, but we contained and doused the flames on our way to you, and the damage was primarily in the outskirts of the farmlands. And, well… definitely minimal compared to  _ your _ damage. What were you thinking, going out there all on your own?! You really couldn’t drag one of us with you?!”

“I’m sorry… I didn’t know if I was already too late…” 

Erin sighed heavily. Lif did seem remorseful, but she also felt flustered in knowing he technically shouldn’t have to be. He did great, and he rescued people while doing it, but once again, Lif’s lovers weren’t exactly thrilled of the heavy toll on his health to get there. 

“Hmm… If you don’t mind, I have something important I would like to ask you…”

At last, Alfonse couldn’t hold it in anymore, and he broke his silence. With the determined look he had, Lif already braced himself in having a strong guess what it was he wanted to ask. With Alfonse’s hesitance making such a look so subtle, it almost entirely confirmed Lif’s suspicions well before he even opened his mouth.

“...Who are you?”

“Alfonse! What kind of a question is that?! This was Lif, isn’t it? Erin spent so much time telling-”

“No, I get that, truly I do, Sharena, but… Who are you  _ really? _ ”

Lif hesitated. It was a bit too long, to a point Alfonse continued on his point just as Ryoma, Camilla and Erin were slowly looking more uncomfortable.

“At first, I thought you might’ve indeed been the first king of Askr. There was certainly more than enough evidence to support such, but… What sense would it make for the first king to know people like princess Fjorm or queen Eliva? Even in the faintest coincidence our kingdoms would continue to name future descendants after long gone historical figures of their home countries, surely, it would be too much of a stretch to believe there was another Fjorm or Eliva in your time, yes…? And something about the way you show concern for them shows you know exactly what you were putting yourself at risk for and for who. It wasn’t just a random act of kindness, you knew exactly what would’ve happened otherwise.”

“.. Saying this much, who do you think I am, Alfonse?”

He knew that he indeed had him figured out after all. There was no use to hide it anymore. Anna and Sharena were exchanging confused and uncertain looks between the point Alfonse was making and the way Ryoma, Camilla and Erin didn’t seem nearly as surprised, but Alfonse would clear the confusion well enough.

“...Did you come from a later time than now? You’re not from the distant past, but from the future, aren’t you?”

Lif simply stared at him. Even so, he had his answer. 

“That’s also why you’ve decided to ambush our summoner, yet you didn’t hurt her. Nor did you hurt any of her heroes. And even so, the four of you get along so well in so little time. Had any of us not known otherwise, it’s as if the four of you have known each other for years.”

“Alfonse, it’s-”

“My apologies, Erin. I know I am overstepping, and especially in regards to his relationship he shares with all of you, but… I want to know. Lif, who are you actually?”

“...You won’t like the answer.” Even with Alfonse’s resolve, Lif couldn’t quite match it. Did he want to explain everything that happened with Hel? Did he want to dump all of his mistakes and sins and grief out in the open right then and there? This Alfonse wasn’t as broken and worn like he was, and while his envy of such was beyond what words could describe, did he  _ really _ want to change any of that right there and then?

And in his hesitance, he briefly broke eye contact from Alfonse to glance to Sharena. Even for as brief as it was, Sharena happened to glance his way just as he looked to her. Even when he hastily looked down and away from her, he was caught in the act.

Alfonse was one thing, but… did he really want to tell Sharena either? Even with Erin accepting him, and Ryoma and Camilla following suit, having her embrace him or pay him any mind was a miracle as it was. Surely… Sharena wouldn’t be as forgiving for what he did to his world...

“...You’re Alfonse.”

He glanced up to Alfonse, but at best, he only sighed heavily. That, however, was enough confirmation for Alfonse.

_ “That’s _ what you’re hesitant to say, isn’t it? You’re an Alfonse of another time.”

“...Not anymore.”

“With the way you-”

_ “Not. Anymore.” _

He struck a nerve. Alfonse realized that well enough to back off, but the damage was done. As Lif tensed enough for his eyes to briefly glow, and his nerves to get the better of him, he quickly transformed his lower face without meaning to, and he unfortunately confirmed that, whatever happened in his time, his inner demons and scars ran far deeper than the Order of Heroes earlier realized.

It confirmed his earlier dragon form wasn’t a fluke. However, it also showed his face in full as what was formerly a cohort of the dead. He couldn’t bear taking that name again. Not anymore. And his feelings of such ended up getting the better of him and made it all worse.

“...I’m sorry. You’re better off not knowing. Or even asking.”

He kept his tone even, and he tried to calm his nerves otherwise, even if he had to force it. Unfortunately, it was far from easy to essentially try to trick himself to be calmer than he really felt, and no amount of trying to rub at his deformed lower face could change that. 

Having someone reach over to touch his lower jaw, it was enough for him to take pause. He initially looked up in thinking it was either Camilla or Erin approaching him and reaching out to him. He wasn’t quite as prepared to find out it was Sharena instead. 

She immediately lost all her earlier cheer. He could see her sadness in her eyes no matter how much effort she put toward hiding it. The longer she studied his features, be it human or otherwise, the more distraught she looked. Seeing her cry or such wasn’t new to him or Alfonse, especially with how well known it was Sharena tends to be rather emotional and expressive. It was the subtler, muted expressions they both worried more of.

Go figure. He was a disappointment to her even when he told her nothing. Maybe his failures were just that pronounced after all. 

“Alfonse…”

She saw the way he looked away from her eyes. She watched the way his eyes were suddenly duller, and how quickly they drooped. He wasn’t just rejecting his original name for the sake of keeping a secret. She saw how much he genuinely  _ did _ seem to lose all pride or hope of it now. To see it have such a pronounced effect on him, however, made her wince with regret. 

“Lif…” She tried to respect his wish this time. She also tried to lift his face just a little more so he would look to her. He still hesitated, but even underneath all the ways his experiences transformed him, for better or worse…

“You…  _ dummy!” _

“Hm-?!”

He felt her rub at his cheeks. She would’ve pinched them otherwise if the reinforced mask-like muzzle he had wasn’t so hardened, so this was her attempt at a compromise. She was quickly returning to her much more peppier mood even as she was scolding him.

“Lif you jerk, you keep this secret and then go off to get yourself hurt like that?! How could you!”

He almost felt like he was in a slight daze. With how quickly Sharena went from being so sad, withdrawn and serious, he didn’t expect her to bounce back so quickly (or swiftly?) into being far more emotionally charged on just how upset she was of him. It even made Alfonse tense of Sharena casually messing with Lif’s face or yelling at him as she had, all with very little thought of it.

“Sharena, please stop-”

_ “No! Stay out of it! No making excuses for him! Both of you are terrible, careless brothers!” _ And maybe she was embellishing, but dammit, she had every right to be angry! 

Against their better judgement, Ryoma couldn’t hold back chuckling in time, and even Camilla and Erin were torn between being sympathetic or amused at Lif’s latest plight. To his bewilderment, he was so caught off guard by Sharena’s declaration of him as her brother that he took pause, wondering if he misheard. It was just enough to ease his nerves to slowly change his lower face back to the more human features he previously had, grotesque as the in-between phase between his ‘mask’ and original mouth briefly was.

“Brother…?”

“Sharena…”

“You heard me!” As Lif’s face fully restored itself, she got her delayed revenge of finally squishing his cheeks. Lif vaguely saw Alfonse wince slightly in sympathy, but did little to stop her. “You did great in rescuing Fjorm and Eliva,  _ but you gotta take care of yourself too! _ I want both my brothers to be safe and healthy, too!”

“Sharena, I-”

“If what Alfonse says is true, it still counts~!” In spite of Lif’s halfhearted attempt to protest, Sharena countered back far too cheerfully than he was used to after so long.

“I don’t deserve-”

“Nonsense! No matter what, you’ll always be my brother~! And now I have a big brother and an even bigger brother! Bonus~!”

“Please, you don’t understand, I-”

“And I never wanna!” Yet again, he felt his cheeks squished. She had a goal in mind, and that was that. 

At first, Lif sighed in half-frustration and half-anguish Sharena wouldn’t give him an inch, but no matter her earlier optimism, she did ease up in the end just enough to share a more sentimental, serious look to him to show she wasn’t  _ entirely _ ignorant of what his attempts to butt in were hinting at.

“Lif, you don’t have to say anymore if you don’t want to. Not if it’ll hurt you. If it’s too much for you, don’t think about it anymore, ok?”

"Sharena…"

"And nothing else you say will change my mind. Or change the fact you're still my brother."

She knew exactly what she was doing. Even when she let his face go, finally, she still pulled him in to hug him. Initially, he stiffened up in still not being used to it all, but as he eased, and as he started trusting the idea that he could be just a little bit more selfish in this once more, he calmed enough to rest his head on Sharena’s shoulder and give up fighting or protesting anymore.

When Alfonse would be too harsh on himself, there was little hope to reason with him anymore. Callous as it was, the only real way to reach through him again and bring him back to his senses was to be firm and forceful with him, and as Sharena proved to herself, that part of Lif barely changed in the slightest after all.

And it proved enough to her that she was right to be stubborn.

* * *

“Well now,  _ you _ certainly look to be in better shape, Lif!”

“...Thank you, Commander.” 

Lif eventually accepted his fate in full. At least Alfonse seemed to ease enough in noticing Lif not pose much of any threat to Sharena, and for the moment, he would humor her of her bold proclamation of him being their new brother, With both Alfonse and Sharena either embracing him or tolerating him otherwise, Anna also relented in trusting their judgement and those of his lovers.

“Good to have you back in top shape! And just in time, too. His Majesty requests an audience with you. Or, well… I suppose it’s more Her Majesty who requests your audience.”

“...Why?”

“W-why…? Oh come now, surely you didn’t forget already! And with a response like that, I guess you and Alfonse really  _ did _ change quite a bit from one another after all...”

However, as he was reminded, Sharena and Alfonse were half the battle.

He had every reason to dread having to meet another version of himself as he had, and the way he envisioned his confession of who he was to his sister went a completely different direction than what Sharena ultimately forced it to be. 

But then there was his parents. He was already dreading that just as much, if not moreso, than his concerns of how the Order of Heroes would react. For that matter, he reminded himself that even if they found out who he really was, there was still even more to unpack eventually of his knowledge of Hel and Thrasir, among the rest of the Realm of the Dead.

But he was also getting ahead of himself...

He would’ve hoped that Henriette and Gustav would only know of the situation to the extent meeting Fjorm and Eliva alone would allow, and leave the rest for what it was: some random dragon who rescued Gnótthæð through dumb luck and happenstance and nothing more. Unfortunately, Henriette found out that there was more to him than ‘just a weird dragon’ and, combined with knowing just the right way to pry out little breadcrumbs through sweet words and charm not even Kagero and Saizo were fully immune to, she found out just enough of Lif to request an audience with him through Anna.

“Lif… I’m sure it’ll be fine…”

For the sake of the Order, Lif tried to prepare. However, it was painfully obvious of where his intentions were when someone who was normally stubborn of wearing accessories was now a little too eager to try to obscure his face with whatever masks Erin had in her hoard. In spite of Erin’s gentle attempts to encourage him, he still wound up taking the mask that most resembled Bruno’s with him, and she gave up trying to protest it.

_ Initially,  _ his lovers were fairly confident to join him for moral support. Unfortunately, Gustav preemptively sabotaged such plans. To say he greatly disappointed Ryoma in his subtle, yet clear preference for Saizo’s presence, but not Kagero’s, was an understatement. To then learn that while Ryoma was also graciously invited to have an audience with the king and queen of Askr, but not so Camilla or Erin, had clearly infuriated him no matter how hard he tried to hide his brewing outrage under a stoic, sharp look. 

For Lif’s sake, Ryoma tried to be patient, but he had also been quick to heavily weigh his options of whether or not to follow Lif’s example and wear a mask like him. He noticed that Alfonse and Sharena were also invited to join him, and with Sharena in particular, he was hopeful that perhaps he was reading too much into the unfortunate coincidences regarding Kagero, Camilla and Erin.

“... _ Son.” _

“Father. It’s been some time since we’ve last spoken, hasn’t it? I am truly honored to not only be granted an audience, but that you would extend such to our companions like Lord Ryoma of Hoshido as well.”

“.. _.And? _ ”

Ryoma quickly learned perhaps his frustrations weren’t quite so misplaced after all.

Lif looked to Ryoma, and for as much as he couldn’t help but notice how much one of his hands was clearly closed and balled into a fist, he seemed to be making the effort not to clench his hand too tight even then, and it was a compromise to otherwise hide how he felt from showing on his face. Before Ryoma could catch him staring, Lif looked ahead toward the queen and king, having his own slew of emotions running through his head that hid behind a similarly stoic frown. 

He had memories flicker of the last time he saw them in his world compared to now. He could still remember the way Gustav was slain by Hel trying to protect him, or the way he saw Fjorm and Henriette collapse beside one another after he performed that damn Heart’s Rite. Like everyone else except Ryoma, they all died once before because of him. Ryoma only lived because of Erin just before his stupid act of performing the rite at all.

And yet here he was, once again uncertain of how much he could pretend things were as fine as they seemed, and how much he still wanted to punish himself, even for the crimes only he knew the full extent of. With this mask, it helped make the task easier to hide his thoughts while they were still so jumbled and conflicted.

“Oh dear, don’t be nervous, Alfonse! He simply missed you for how long it’s been, that’s all.”

Even this conversation was similar enough to leave him conflicted. He wasn’t sure what to think, but while Henriette and Gustav remained focused more on Alfonse, Lif kept to himself and avoided drawing more attention to himself too soon. 

However, as much as he felt it odd to have a different perspective on something like this, he debated on whether or not it was a good thing.

“...Henriette, please be more discreet.”

“Oh! My mistake!”

He noticed things now that he took for granted back when he was in Alfonse’s shoes. He noticed the slightly tense look Gustav shot to Henriette, which she was as cheerful as ever and ready to simply accept and move on. When he was busy focusing on Gustav back then, and watched Alfonse seemed just as hesitant, distracted, and not as confident as a moment earlier, Lif had time to notice the small tells in Ryoma’s body language to see the samurai not take kindly to his suspicions slowly being confirmed.

“As Prince Alfonse says, it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance.” Or rather, he was simply being courteous for the sake of image, but Lif remained impressed how Ryoma was good in making it seem far from obvious how fake the pleasantries were. Even he was fooled, if also concerned of what went through Ryoma’s thoughts right then. “I am certain you’ve heard well enough from my retainers of what transpired in Gnótthæð, yes? That was the subject you called us here to discuss?”

“Indeed.” Gustav nodded in addressing Ryoma politely enough,

“Father, in regards to the dragon-”

“Why would you take such a foolish risk in leaving your duties in the claws of a dragon?”

But that quickly changed the moment Alfonse spoke up again.

“I… we…”

“It wasn’t just some random dragon! Lif was just trying-”

“I believe I was talking to  _ your brother _ , Sharena.”

“Y...yes sir…”

“What’s more, that dragon of yours… What kind of plan were you concocting to set a dragon loose to go on a rampage all throughout Gnótthæð to frighten the people there? While the king of Muspell and his generals were sighted no less! One miscalculation, and that dragon ‘ally’ of yours could’ve frightened the whole lot of them straight toward the general!”

“I had to do what I-”

“And from the eye witness reports collected, it appeared your dragon ally rushed headlong against the general with hardly a plan to counter the Undying Flame itself. Have you already forgotten about the prophecy? Or did you not listen to me after all during all your tutoring? For one who relies so heavily on the assistance of an unruly dragon, you’ve narrowly led such a dragon to its death fairly easily, Alfonse!”

_ “I believe that dragon was what made the difference between Gnótthæð and utter destruction, your  _ **_majesty._ ** _ ” _

At last, Ryoma couldn’t tolerate it anymore and his voice tensed more than he liked. However, he was immediately frustrated for how meek Alfonse turned to accept it all by contrast.

“Y… Yes, Father, I understand…”

_ “Alfonse, he-” _

“He’s right, Lord Ryoma, I… I accept the responsibility fully…”

“Hmph. Well met, Alfonse.”

Ryoma bristled more. Lif visibly tensed to a point his hands were starting to shake a little. Despite Ryoma being frustrated beyond words of how quickly Alfonse folded, Lif quietly watched and took in the new perspective he had of this. He himself didn’t even argue for himself no matter how much Gustav clearly saw him as little else but some feral beast contained in a calm, obedient human vessel at the moment.

He heard the words exchanged as Gustav continued to lay into Alfonse the risks Lif technically took. Even if it was more Lif’s failings than Alfonse’s, the prince turned heavily meek and simply agreed and kept his head low. It eventually was painfully clear how much he agreed more for the sake of agreeing at first, before - to Ryoma’s outrage - it became even more apparent how much those words were starting to take their hold to hold more grain of truth in them of Alfonse’s own worth. 

_ “With all due respect, I believe you owe it to  _ **_your own children_ ** _ to give each of them a proper chance to explain themselves,  _ **_King._ ** _ ” _

“With all due respect, I believe I have  _ not _ requested parenting advice from one I am aware has little experience on such a field,  **_High prince.”_ **

“How  _ dare you-” _

“Ryoma, please don’t-”

“You are not a hero, Alfonse. You need not be amidst them, waving your sword about when you should know by now your place is elsewhere. You of all people should  _ especially _ know better than to have a hero hold your hand and speak for you! Do you use your heroes to do your work for you now? Is  _ that _ what can be expected from Askr’s heir now?!”

“ _ Enough…” _

He couldn’t take anymore. He couldn’t remain quiet any longer.

Lif clearly saw Ryoma open his mouth, ready to protest some more before stopping and looking at him at his growl. Even Sharena and Alfonse took pause to look behind him, noticing Lif gritting his now-sharpened teeth, and the way the swordsman was visibly shaking where he stood. His breaths were heavy and visible.

“And who are you to-”

_ “ _ **_That’s enough!_ ** _ ” _ He didn’t give him an inch. It was just like how Sharena handled him, but with far from the same mood behind it.  _ “I may have let you run your course last time, but I won’t have you do it again!  _ Sacrificing the people in front of you for the greater good of many…  _ You’d ridicule us over being short-sighted of the suffering in front of you, but when everyone suffers, what then? To just let everything burn and rot before you give a damn anymore? Was that your definition of a king?” _

_ “And who are  _ **_you_ ** _ to address me as such? You  _ **_will_ ** _ know your place-” _

**_“Silence!_ ** ”

Ryoma restraining himself was what kept this visit from becoming dangerously political between Hoshido and Askr. Even so, nobody came prepared for the sharp bite in Lif’s voice when he commanded Gustav to stand down. He didn’t stop to think that maybe there was more to it than just his tone that was at play, like the way his body was betraying him as his emotions ran too high to hide hints to what he became. He took full advantage of the newfound silence with hardly much thought of its cause.

“... To rely on ourselves over our allies from another world. Askr has only itself to rely on, and everyone else is merely a tool, right?  _ That _ was your philosophy of what made for a great king. Your belief was that every force in realms other than this one was just another avenue for either more tools, or more misfortune... ‘There is nothing to be gained by meddling with other realms’. _ Hah…” _

“Lif… Don’t say something you’ll regret…” Briefly distracted from Gustav, Ryoma took a much gentler tone to Lif, even if he tried to be firm to warn him. Unfortunately, it was too late.

_“Say things I’ll regret? Ah, yes…_ ** _Regret…_** _If there was anything I regret more, it was not realizing_ ** _how full of shit you were far sooner!_** _Maybe if I had,_ ** _Erin wouldn’t have died!_** **_And neither would everyone else! It was because of that kind of philosophy that I nearly added to my regret twice over!_** _Perhaps Alfonse has more of a chance to be a better king than either of us, but not if you kill that spirit again before it even sparks!”_

There was an uncomfortably long silence. It may have been mere seconds, but they felt slow and agonizing.

Lif opened his maw to shout some more, but by then, Ryoma firmly grabbed his shoulder and held him, moving up to redirect his focus on him.

**_“Lif, enough!”_ **

Initially, he wanted to argue with Ryoma next, but seeing the way he looked concerned, almost  _ scared _ for him, it was enough to bring Lif to his senses.

And it was also just enough to see he indeed made a terrible mistake. He spoke too much, and he left the Askrans completely stunned into silence for what damage he already did. So many stares burned and pierced into him. He heard soft whispers that repeated key words of his outburst back like “Again…?”, “Erin  _ died? _ ” and other glaring clues he couldn’t salvage this. The only one who was neither shocked, nor outraged by Lif was Ryoma, who took a gentler approach in trying to bring Lif enough to his senses to ease himself back to normal.

“That’s enough, Lif…” His voice was softer and near hushed. He reached over to cup Lif’s cheek and noticed the signs of him slowly changing back, but not nearly as quickly as he hoped as his nerves were still rattled. Realizing the magnitude of what he did, he didn’t dare look to the king and queen directly again and simply turned away, formalities and decorum be damned.

“...E-excuse me…”

“Wait…  _ Please wait-!” _

“My apologies, but this is over. Let’s go, you two.” Ryoma also gave up. There was no coming back to this, and while he was courteous enough on how to speak to Henriette when Lif already ran away, he didn’t care to carry this on any longer either, and he was quick to try to verbally nudge Sharena and Alfonse to follow him. Lif didn’t wait to see how successful Ryoma actually was of such, only that he may have potentially made things worse for Alfonse and Sharena over better.

Time was like a blur to him after. All he focused on or thought about was just heading straight home. His nerves were shot, his heart pounded, and he was to a point his mouth held the anatomy, disfigurement and blue aura of his monstrous dragon form, but not the black and silver colorings, which seem to alternate on how prominent it was or how faded it was to his sickly pale skin tone otherwise as his mood randomly fluctuated all throughout his travels. 

By the time he came home, Camilla and Erin didn’t even bother to stop and ask him how it went just based on the visible tells of his transformation saying far more than enough. To then see Ryoma show up an hour or so after with such a terrifying aura and a murderous look in his eyes further confirmed it was best not to ask then and there in favor of both of them trying to calm and distract their lovers into cooling off. 

Even when Lif finally calmed enough to look human again, the most he was willing to say was initially repeating and reiterating “I messed up.” before outright escalating to “I fucked up…”, with barely the energy to elaborate otherwise before Camilla, and especially Erin tried to calm him enough to rest. Even when Ryoma eventually calmed down enough to speak, all it accomplished was leaving Erin with the task of trying to keep him  _ and _ Camilla calm against both otherwise trying to declare war on Gustav for just how much Ryoma ranted at his disgust of him.

“Erin-!” “Where are you going?!”

**_“Where the fuck is he, I’m gonna bust a cap up his ass!”_ **

_ “ERIN NO!” “GODS, ERIN PLEASE-!” _

And then succeeded in distracting both of them long enough for them to shift their focus in calming Erin, when she heard the treatment of Alfonse and Sharena specifically, and was seconds away from bursting out of their dormitory to storm the Askran’s royal castle on her own likewise.

* * *

Alfonse hesitated. Surely he was rubbing salt in the wounds at this point, and especially at this hour.

But between the revelation of who Lif was, the way he exploded on Gustav, and the way even Ryoma left enraged and bitter, the prince hesitated to let these feelings fester and go unchecked just like that. Not without at least  _ trying _ to make up for his failings. It was, after all, because of him they were all so upset and heated. It didn’t occur to him how much of it might’ve been  _ Gustav _ they held ill will to instead.

With a sigh, Alfonse knocked on the door. A few moments after, Camilla answered it. He could clearly see a moment where she was obviously in a bitter mood, even if she tried just as quickly to hide it the moment she noticed Alfonse. 

"Oh, at this hour…? This is rather unlike you, but not any less appreciated, dear little prince..."

"My apologies, but I am here for something important…"

Camilla was patient and calm toward him, which Alfonse took as a good sign he didn't completely burn their good will irreparably. 

Even so, Alfonse couldn't bring back the confidence he lost. It wasn't even enough to hide how meek he was, and she could tell right away he was little different from a frightened pup when he looked and acted like he fully expected her to lash out at him any moment now.

Without a second thought, she opened the door wider and moved up to him. He was hesitant, and she could clearly feel him flinch when pulled close to her, but she already vented enough of her feelings of the matter for the night in private, and she wasn't about to stand to see this side of Alfonse for too long either, given the context.

"I'll go bring Lif, and in the meantime, perhaps Erin can keep you warm and cozy."

"I-I don't mean to trouble all of you with tha-"

_ "I insist, dear." _ She smiled sweetly enough, but her voice stressed with enough proof Alfonse should probably not argue too much after all. 

Sure enough, before he even could, and while he was still left flushed at Camilla's choice of words, Erin just so happened to step out of her room in the dormitory, dressed down to simple, baggy clothes different from what normally hid under her coat, and an overall casual look to her that hinted she was earlier relaxing with internet videos and article tabs aplenty a moment ago.

"Eriiiin, you always have such good timing, darling…~"

Granted, Camilla taking a cutesy tone to her wasn't new, but between the way Camilla clearly forced a smile, and how she could clearly see Alfonse awkwardly standing just behind her, Erin could already tell this was more about why Ryoma was currently still fuming in private, or why Lif closed himself off in bed this early in the night. Camilla walked up to her side and leaned up to her ear.

"(Please treat him gently, dear…)" 

And even if Erin already had her suspicions, this simply confirmed them. While Camilla kissed Erin, initially aiming for her cheek before the summoner met her lips to lips instead, Erin left Camilla to her own devices with Lif while she approached Alfonse calmly, and with a bit more outward shows of her concern.

"How you holdin' up, bud?"

"...I… *ahem* No, this isn't fair. I clearly stirred all of you up-"

"Easy there, Alf. Hold your horses, will you?" 

He hesitated, but he stopped immediately at Erin's prompt, moreso when she reached over and slid an arm over his shoulder while not-so-subtly leading him to a couch. At least by that point, Alfonse was used to the contact, especially for how much of a struggle it was on Ryoma's and Camilla's part to get her to be so casual and intimate like this compared to how withdrawn she was so long ago.

"If there's anyone we think who's taking the piss, it’s your shithead dad, not you."

"E-Erin, did you really have to put it like that…?"

"If you showed up any earlier, you would've got an international lesson on how to say far worse in Nohrian and Hoshidan. Trust me."

He snorted before he could help himself. There was a brief moment he immediately regretted it, but Erin simply grinned at it.

_ "Heh! _ Look, you took the time to come all the way over here, I'm not gonna spend the night listening to you gaslight yourself more over it, ok?"

"What does this have to do with lighting up gas…?"

"Glad you asked~ Lawd knows you certainly need that lesson most. And after that, I swear, I'll send you back home smiling no matter how many dumb cat videos and memes I gotta shove at your face to do it!"

"I…I sort of understand what you mean, but sure…"

At least the smaller present Alfonse is in good hands, but that left the bigger, angstier one to tend to.

Camilla knew better than to try to push Lif too much, too soon. Her original plan was to let Erin buy her some time in keeping Alfonse busy while easing Lif's nerves herself. After all, it was still clear Erin knew the Order of Heroes best out of all of them but Lif. 

"You  _ warned _ me, and yet I still-!"

"Shh, shh… it's ok…"

"You were there…! You heard and saw everything, and yet how could you still-!"

"Lif, hush, please. Hear me out…"

But to her surprise, as she neared Lif's room, she heard the words exchanged long before she noticed his door was open. She peeked in and, sure enough, Ryoma was there sitting beside Lif on his bed. She caught him just in time to notice Ryoma pull Lif into a hug, and only separated long enough to hold his shoulders as the two focused so much on each other that they didn't realize Camilla crossed her arms and leaned against the doorframe.

"Maybe it could've been handled differently, but you had reached your limits back then."

"That hardly excuses it…"

"But it would be just as unfair to treat this as if you were willfully careless and tactless either. Especially compared to last time…"

He brushed the bangs of Lif's face just enough to expose his eyes again. He was already showing the warning signs of an imminent change, but at the moment, he only got as far as exhaling blue puffs of mist and causing his eyes to glow, if dimly. And yet, none of it intimidated Ryoma or changed the tender look he had for him. If there was a change, it was how bittersweet it turned in his own regrets.

"It would be hypocritical of me to scold you of it anyways. Even if you held your own nerves, I'm afraid I can't promise that I wouldn't have lost my own nerves had you not beaten me to it…"

Lif hesitated, but Ryoma continued.

"I failed you and Erin last time… Erin tried to hide so much of what happened leading up to it, and I underestimated how much she was keeping this between the three of you… Even when I saw how angered Erin was, and how defeated you were likewise, I underestimated how much you went through. I don't have the same experiences you share with Erin and Camilla to understand those kind of feelings as deeply and personally as the three of you, but I should've been there with the two of you back then to still support you better…"

"It wouldn't have been fair to ask you. Then  _ or _ now."

"I didn't want to fail you both again. That's why I insisted this time. Even so-"

"Even so, from the sound of it, you both did your best…"

Eventually, she couldn't stay quiet anymore. She noticed how quickly both Lif and Ryoma perkes up at the sight of her, and in short order, both of them moved to make room for her. She returned the favor in kind in pulling each of them close with either arms and kissing either on the cheek.

"With or without experience, you can only do so much… I believe that's what Erin insisted before as well. Even that remains a difficult thought to take in all the way… But for the two of you to return free of blood stains, you both did what you could…"

"I still could've handled it far better…" He appreciated Camilla's attempts to comfort him (in her own way), but Lif still shook his head. "And now I said too much. It would've been easier to just leave everything buried, yet I ran my tongue and…" 

It  _ would _ be easier to keep it all buried. It was what he hoped he could do for everyone else, once he became more thoughtful of it all again. Why trouble anyone when he could continue shouldering the grief on his own and simply fix the dangers before they start? Why waste time and nerves explaining otherwise?

"Would it really, though…?"

He and Ryoma hesitated, but heard Camilla out.

"You three are quite terrible at sharing the wealth… Always shouldering everything until you run yourselves dry… Then again, I suppose I was hardly one to talk either…"

"Cam…" Ryoma hesitated whether or not to argue the point, but when he faltered, she continued. 

"I believe it's a lesson we all seem to need to learn together. To depend on one another just a little more. As someone who lacks much of the experiences the two of you get to share, I simply wish not to remain locked out… Especially if it means I could do even just a little more to protect you… Must you truly keep yourselves so far out of reach…? Was it really fair to keep the rest of us in the dark forever…?"

"It would hurt less…"

"Lots of things hurt, dear… Sometimes the way to make it hurt less is in other's hands… Like how you would readily trust more physical wounds to the hands of a healer, yes?"

"...I don't know if I should even explain what I can to Alfonse, much less anyone else. It's easier said than done. He remains ignorant of what's ahead of him, and with that, he has yet to develop the same clouded views I have… I already took the three of you away from him. I took his own summoner away from him. Would it  _ really _ be fair to take that optimism from him, too?"

He saw her point, and he knew his weakness remained of his beliefs otherwise, but there were still parts of those beliefs he still couldn't fully brush away no matter the reasoning.

Meanwhile, Camilla seized the opportunity to get Lif and Alfonse to talk.

"I feel perhaps even he wants to know more than you're giving him credit for, Lif…"

"...What gives you that idea?"

"For starters, he is here."

"Really?" Even Ryoma was caught off guard of having guests.

"Oh yes. He and Erin are out by our living room, chatting away as we speak."

"At this hour?"

"Hmhmhm it surprised me too, Ryoma, truly… But… for him to go out of his way to visit lil old us, surely you of all people can guess why, can you Lif?"

He hesitated. Initially, he wanted to protest, but the more he thought about it, he couldn't. 

Camilla didn't even need to tell him Alfonse was here to see him. The idea quickly came to mind with only a somewhat smaller possibility it was just to see Erin. But as Ryoma and Camilla remained quiet in giving him a moment to think it over, he could very faintly hear Alfonse's voice between chatter or slightly less soft laughing.

It confirmed to him more that it wasn't Erin he was here for after all. At this hour, and with what were probably things from the internet she was showing him, he remembered how much she tried to bond with him similarly as Alfonse, but did so usually in brief pockets throughout the day to break up the monotony or tension of their duties. If it was something serious with Erin, he wouldn't have stuck so long at this hour when they so clearly got along and moved past any tension.

Had the roles reversed, Lif had to admit that he probably  _ would _ want to seek out and speak with another version of himself, too. Especially one who clearly knows more than he initially let on.

"H-haa~ Where do you even keep finding these?"

"It's not hard to find if you know where to look. Maybe tomorrow I'll show Sharena, too. I was already planning to, anyways."

"Hmhmhm~ I can see why. She'd love this."

So Lif gave in. He heard their points and comforts, and he resolved to get up and face Alfonse. While Camilla and Ryoma were fully supportive, both still tried to give him a bit of space. 

By the time he got to Erin and Alfonse, the two of them were focused on Erin's phone, and Alfonse was in far better spirits compared to how he was before showing up, all as Camilla hoped for. Already, Ryoma and Lif both softened at the sight, yet Ryoma and Camilla kept their distance in watching the others.

It wasn't like Erin didn't show her things on her phone before. Not only was she just as eager to still show things to him even as Lif, but she was just as open in showing Ryoma and Camilla things similarly, and the three had more exclusive views of things she shared on her laptop on top of it all. But to see the same sight left Ryoma nostalgic, and left Lif sentimental of the perspective change.

But even so, Lif unfortunately had to interrupt. He cleared his throat and drew their attention immediately on him. Quickly, not only did Alfonse straighten his posture, but immediately stood up, as if once again panicking into trying to force himself to present himself as a proper prince who would never engage in memes and cat videos ever.

Lif glanced back just enough to see small, subtle gestures of Ryoma and Camilla trying to encourage him. As he and Alfonse looked back to Erin, she not-so-subtly gave both of them the thumbs up.

It took the two a moment to settle somewhere private in the dormitory while Erin, Ryoma and Camilla gave them space, but for a moment, the two didn't entirely hide the hints they were still one in the same with how tense and awkward they both were. If anything, the key difference was Lif's massive size change and his nerves being somewhat less obvious.

"...So, ah… Alf-" 

He immediately saw Lif's eyes narrow a little out of reflex, and he hastily corrected himself.

_ "Lif. _ Lif. Sorry…"

But despite Alfonse's clumsy attempt to correct himself, Lif sighed.

"...I should apologise as well. But I no longer hold any right to that name."

"Was your experiences really that bad…? What happened?"

"...Was that why you're here?"

"Erm… Not initially, but…" 

He hesitated more. Go figure only  _ Alfonse _ would know how to make a chat with himself more awkward than it already was. Erin helped him recover from his earlier slump, but he regained some of his earlier guilt now that he reminded himself of his initial purpose of being here.

"I wanted to apologize for earlier… With how uncomfortable you were, I can only imagine what you've went through, and especially what drove you to say what you had. I hadn't… I… I didn't even consider the examples like you losing your summoner…"

He didn't answer Alfonse back. Not right away. He could see that while Alfonse did his best to describe what happened vaguely and simply to spare his nerves, but he noticed little tells in his smaller counterpart. Alfonse's eyes dimmed a little, and his voice faltered again, particularly over recounting the death of a summoner he couldn't even bring himself to name. 

He reminded himself of his relationship with Erin around this time. They were friends right up until she was about to die. Lif realized his feelings too late last time. He realized too late when that could've easily changed, had he not still been so callous of how much he disregarded Erin as a person over Askr's asset. His own eyes dimmed in recalling how he didn't even know what she looked like past her lower face, what her real name was besides initially guessing 'Kiran', or even how to address her back then. He could guess this Alfonse might've been starting to realize that himself now.

"...Do I even need to ask?"

"...Would you really be comfortable? To tell us what happened? Or even to just tell me…?"

"How much of it do you want to know? By now, you should know what to expect."

"I-I know… I can guess, especially for how vague you continued to keep it all…"

"And yet, you still want to know anyways. Wouldn't it be easier to stay ignorant?"

"Maybe so, but it wouldn't be fair to everyone else. Nor would it be right."

Lif paused, glancing Alfonse's way. So Camilla had a point after all. In spite of Lif's doubts, Alfonse continued.

"Even if the details are painful, I still would want to know. It's valuable information that could help us, perhaps even change the course of fate even. That's why you went out of your way to attack Surtr, yes? If the rest of us knew what you do, we could strengthen our chances to change whatever's to come. We could help you."

Lif huffed in disbelief. He couldn't stop himself in time. He missed that sense of 'anything can change' optimism. He nearly thought his own senses died when his Askr had. Even now, he still had his doubts of how much of a difference could be truly made even with what had already changed this time. Surtr was one thing, but what of Hel?

But maybe that's what Hel tried to suppress before in him and Thrasir. If Alfonse confronted him with such thoughts sooner, he wouldn't think twice to dismiss him, mock him even. 

Now? His thoughts were a bit clearer. They weren't quite as grim. And he reminded himself that the Breidablik of his world had absorbed and harnessed the power from Angrboða's heart, and Erin was still alive to actually use that power when he alone couldn't back then. He remembered losing all his hope back then when all of his sacrifices were poured into a weapon he couldn't use anyways, and how quickly Hel consumed him with despair before capturing and cursing him.

But now, if he, Ryoma and Camilla were to protect Erin from that fate…

"...Fine."

Immediately, Alfonse perked.

"Lif… Thank you."

"But not tonight. And not all at once… I need a bit more time, but you made your point clear."

"Of course, Lif. And… thank you for earlier. But surely you were giving me too much-"

"Stop."

He did as he was told, as surprised as he was of Lif. He felt a chill in the back of his neck when the two locked eyes, much as he regretted it.

"I've made my mistakes I cannot undo. Gustav made his. He may continue to make his own choices, and I won't even pretend like I could sway his mind. But you… don't make my mistakes, Alfonse."

"I- … Y-yes. I swear it. If you'll help me, it's a promise…"

"Thank you…"

Maybe there really  _ was _ a point to this after all. He was finally convinced to at least try it.

* * *

“Um… Erin… Is Lif around, by any chance?”

As calm as everyone was by the following day, the shame Lif felt had still remained, and there were still lingering hints here and there of the aftermath of what he did. Even as Anna  _ initially _ gave them all privacy after leading the group to the royal family in the first place, she read enough on Lif’s, Ryoma’s, and then both Alfonse’s and Sharena’s reactions to realize what was initially a meeting prefaced as one of praise had ended up going completely wrong. 

With such in mind, she was even more shy than normal in approaching Erin, noticing that as much as the summoner was in a less murder-happy mood compared to the previous night, she was still visibly cranky, and she guessed as much she would only get crankier when she had to reveal to the summoner what news she brought with her.

“Her Majesty um… She wanted to meet Lif again…”

“Tell Gustav he's cordially invited to kiss both cheeks of my ass. I see what he's trying to do there. The cowardly shitheel...” Erin didn’t even hesitate. Fortunately, Anna knew by now when to make a judgement call in obviously not passing such off such a message.

“Eriiiin… But, fortunately, I do mean  _ just _ Queen Henriette this time, not her and His Majesty.”

All she got was a disbelieving snort from Erin, and a sharper glare to follow suit. Had it been Ryoma or Camilla instead, she imagined this was far milder by comparison of what to expect.

“Look, just between you and me, Henriette  _ did _ end up calling Gustav out for his behavior after.”

A raised eyebrow this time. Progress!

“Yeah! You could hear it from two halls down! Despite her cheerful personality, she  _ does _ know when to be surprisingly fierce! Makes you wonder if Sharena gets her claws from her, too! Or what it’s like when  _ she _ gets to a point of showing ‘em, huh~”

Erin merely sighed in response. She didn’t quite initially buy Anna’s words or embelishings, but she did, eventually, lighten up in appreciating Anna’s attempts to stretch her professional neck out to try to appease her. 

“...I’ll pass the word to Lif and let him decide. But if he doesn’t want any more to do with it, either they back off, or we’ll make 'em. Deal?”

“Haa, well, I suppose you’ll be saving me quite the chat, so, uh… Fine. Deal.”

So Erin kept her word. She passed the news to Lif. Nothing more, nothing less. 

At first, Lif was inclined never to have to see Henriette or Gustav directly again. As if their meeting earlier didn’t already burn the bridge as it is, now she wants an encore of that?! They were better off forgetting who he was, or that he even exists!

But… at the same time, he also didn’t give a final, definite answer either. It would’ve been easy enough to just tell Erin clearly that he really didn’t want to do this again, and not only did Erin bend herself backwards reassuring him that he didn’t  _ have _ to do this, and Ryoma and Camilla were fully supportive to protect him and flex their royal titles to ensure it similarly, he found himself unable to commit to dismissing the offer entirely, and Anna was left without much of an answer to deliver back likewise.

He hesitated. He still kept the mask he took from Erin’s accessory hoard, and while Erin, Ryoma and Camilla still waited patiently for an answer or who he felt comfortable going with, he wound up sneaking out of their notice entirely when the three were busy to handle this on his own.

He hated being so secretive, but this was his own mess, and his own problem. Not theirs…

Anna kept her word as well. He knew the way to the royal castle, the chambers, and the path to the throne room all on his own, even without Anna’s guidance. Every step he took, he mentally compared the in-tact castle to the ruins he left behind in his original world. It was bittersweet now to see the contrast between the world where life remained, and the world where everything around him died.

Up ahead of him, Henriette waited for him. Even without Anna to introduce him or warn her, she seemed to have been waiting for some time, all in the faint hope he would show up eventually. It just made this feel that much more painful.

“...Your Majesty…” His voice was weaker and softer than last time. He lost a lot of his edge in his voice, even compared to his normal tones. He was also slow and hesitant in the entire process of him kneeling in front of her and hanging his head low in shame. “...I deeply apologize for my earlier conduct… Regardless of the reason in calling for me here, it needed to be said…”

She didn’t respond back. He could vaguely hear sounds that tipped him off that Henriette stood up from the throne and walked, possibly toward him. He could hear her heels click as the empty, quiet halls made the lone clicks that much more pronounced to his ears. Eventually, they stopped, and he dared to look up.

She loomed over him. She reached over to grab either sides of his mask, and while he hesitated, the effort was weak, and she easily took the mask off from over his eyes, exposing the rest of his face. Something about the saddened look in her eyes that betrayed her weakened smile left him hesitant to put much effort into fighting the attempt.

“...I knew it…”

She suspected it back then, but to see him in full, it erased her doubts.

Lif had his differences from Alfonse, but even with them, she could still recognize her son no matter how much his life had so heavily transformed him. He looked back to her, but hesitated and faltered, drifting his eyes away from her face. 

It was her son after losing everything. It was her son after he tried and failed in more ways than he could cope anymore.

"Welcome home…"

But Henriette still pulled Lif into a hug without a second thought, because to her, it was still  _ her son. _

"This… this isn't-"

"It could be. And it always will be. Even if you come from another Askr."

Just like Sharena, when Henriette was set in her ways, she knew just the way to force it. Lif already lost some of his will to protest, even if he still felt conflicted of it.

"I'm not your son anymore… I did so many things to lose that right, including my former name… You don't know what I did to get here…"

"I know you were always one to be so hard on yourself. Sometimes  _ too _ hard." She separated just enough to hold either of his cheeks in her hands, but nonetheless, Henriette remained stubborn. "If it hurts you too much, then I'll try to call you 'Lif' from now on, but… Oh… my poor boy, what happened to you…?"

Lif hesitated more. Even when he promised to be much more upfront of such truths to Alfonse or the Order of Heroes, could he really do the same with the queen? He hesitated just as much when it turned out Gustav broke Henriette's promise after all of a meeting just between him and Henriette, and he came out from hiding.

To her credit, he noticed Henriette seemed just as surprised of him showing up, but she was far more optimistic of seeing him, even in spite of her brewing tears. Lif was so drained and conflicted that in his uncertainties, he didn't even realize he had tears of his own to contrast such an exhausted overall look.

"Oh, Gustav, I was right! See? It really  _ was _ Alfonse! Or, oops… He would rather be called 'Lif' now… H-haha, to think, he could do our ancestor proud~"

Lif winced a little, not that she noticed. He could tell she was trying to build his confidence, but if she knew the truth, she would've known he did the exact opposite so far.

He watched Gustav approach them, and while Henriette hesitated, she released Lif to give the two space. His expression was more muted and solemn now. It was a sharp contrast to the stern look he gave Alfonse, or his fiery spirit when he clashed so heavily with Ryoma. 

But now he had his sights on Lif. There was no more of Alfonse standing between them or to distract him with. The king gestured Lif to rise, and while Lif was nowhere near as nervous as Alfonse was in Gustav's presence anymore, he still was slow to rise to his feet in his unease. 

He dreaded what Gustav had to say, even if he didn't show it. If  _ he _ knew the full truth likewise, he could imagine what kind of hell there was to pay in comparison to how he chewed Alfonse out for what was also technically his own mistakes.

"...Son."

Maybe he wasn't  _ entirely _ above his past unease as he hoped, and he hesitated to correct Gustav as readily as Henriette.

"...Your Majesty." 

But his feelings remained the same. He still wasn't sure whether to allow himself to be a part of this family quite yet. Gustav slowly sighed, but didn't correct him either.

"...If it's as I suspect it is, then you know the truth."

"...Yes."

"Have you already told Alfonse?"

"Not yet."

"Then consider it the dying request of a man not to tell him until the time calls for it."

Lif didn't answer, but Gustav accepted it, as frustrated as he was. He couldn't quite force Lif either way. 

"Oh, Gustav, don't do that to him… That's simply too much…!"

"Which is exactly why he should know the weight behind that decision. And he should understand just as well the importance of it."

"...Your illness isn't what claimed you."

"Hmph. You cannot completely fool me. However you managed to be human, you can't escape from the signs giving you away. Hel claimed you before, didn't she?"

"She no longer holds me."

"So you admit after all she claimed you?"

Lif's eyes narrowed, and he tensed, but didn't answer. It only confirmed Gustav's suspicions of what kind of alternative Askr Lif must have come from specifically.

Was he going to scold him then? Was he going to rub it in his face how he was far from one to talk after all of his earlier rant? 

He saw Gustav approach him, and out of instinct, Lif took a few steps back at first. 

But to his surprise, even as Gustav caught on to his act enough to take longer and quicker steps, what he didn't expect was for Gustav to grab him and pull him close.

"...Then that confirms my suspicions. The fact you exist proves that I failed."

He considered this his own failure? He wasn't sure what to make of his words or how he was hugging him, but it caught Lif off guard for him to admit his failings in the first place. It further didn't help Henriette was distracting him more in still looking him over when Gustav pulled away to get a better look of him.

"Oooh, Lif dear, you must be so exhausted… I can only imagine what you've been through… my poor boy…"

"Alfonse… no. Lif. Though your tactics are still as careless as ever, you were given an advantage. If you can be trusted not to squander that gift, then I have a request."

"...Yes…?"

"Lead my son. Lead Alfonse well with that knowledge. If you wish to prove yourself, prove you still have the makings of a king in guiding Alfonse. If you wish to prove to me where my ideals of what makes a king were failing, prove them to me with Alfonse. Show me with your own merits."

"...Very well."

* * *

"Lif dear, welcome home… How'd it go?"

After Gustav urged him to help guide Alfonse, Henriette  _ tried _ to salvage the situation in trying to cheer him up in the quality time she invited him to with her and Gustav. 

Unfortunately, try as Lif might, it was just too much for him to accept all at once. He had a completely different idea of how they would've reacted to him besides Henriette quickly accepting him, and in spite of Gustav accepting him to recognize him as his son, there was still lingering tension to remind him he  _ did _ blow up on him the day before that Henriette's optimism couldn't fully heal. Even when she tried her best, all her encouragement of remarking how big he got, how tough he looked, and how especially 'like a king' he was made him drown just a little more in his guilt when it was clear she had a far different idea in her head of what he was compared to reality. In the end, he took the coward's way out and didn't even try to reveal just how wrong she was of him.

So when he came home to Camilla greeting him, and a face full of the strong scent of something cooking deeper in their dormitory kitchen, he tried to make an effort to force himself to smile and be cheerful.

"It went well. Very well."

"That asshole didn't sneak his way in again, did he?!"

But he wasn't fooling anyone. Camilla's own smile faltered in concern, and even without Lif's incredibly awkward attempt at a smile, he could hear Erin deeper in the dormitory, and she saw through him just as easily just on his tone of voice alone.

"Oh Lif… C'mere…"

She didn't need the details right at their doorstep. She pulled Lif into a hug while he just barely caught the door on his way in. Fortunately, it closed just in time to hide how Camilla pulled him into her so hard that he lost his footing and nearly crashed face first in her breasts if he hadn't caught himself in time. 

"Come on, join us… We've been worried about you…" Whether or not Camilla tried to make him trip into her on purpose, she was quite keen to hide it, but she still led Lif closer to the others to show off it was Ryoma and Erin who were trying to cook, Ryoma moreso as Erin seemed mostly doing prep-work in dicing onions.

"Weeeell?" She also didn't forget trying to shout out to Lif earlier, even when she visibly focused on the onions. Lif hesitated, but between her and Camilla, he couldn't quite hide anymore his chat earlier didn't exactly leave him brimming with joy.

He sighed, but quickly gave in.

"They took it surprisingly well of who I was. They also already had their suspicions of it." Although he realized it might've showed just how much he blurted out after all for that to be the case. "But… I couldn't tell them too much. Hen-... Mother… Her expectations were far too high of me, and I couldn't bear to break her heart with the truth. Not yet."

"Hmhm, if you ask us, maybe she wasn't quite wrong…" 

"I… She had far too high expectations, and I promise I had certainly betrayed them…" 

"Expectations such as…?"

"Considering me worthy enough to be a king, remarking how I've grown up, how… Erin, please don't give me such a look…"

She tried to play coy, but she was already grinning part of the way in, and that grin grew broader and less subtle the more he continued. He only stopped glaring at Erin when Camilla patted his shoulder and tried to ease him more.

"Your experiences and confidence aside, Lif… Please, don't be so harsh on yourself."

"And even if you don't believe in yourself now, there is plenty of time to prove yourself  _ now _ with us." Ryoma also added to her point, even as his visible focus went in continuing to cook. 

Lif sighed. Henriette may have been blissfully ignorant, but he relented to a slightly more genuine smile as his lovers once again pulled him through his still murky and cynical thoughts.

"Did Anna at least keep her word though?" Even when Erin eased, Lif didn't exactly answer her question earlier. 

"At first. He showed up as well. I promise, however, we did not argue again."

"Good!" It was more than Ryoma could ask for, and Erin and Camilla agreed.

"Mmhmm. He insisted I am to guide Alfonse to be a better king."

At least, until he made the mistake of elaborating too much.

"...Is that so?"

"What were his exact words?"

Lif wound up being a little too relaxed and parroted them without thought. All he wanted was to relax and get it out of his mind, all while remaining oblivious of why Erin in particular seemed to have a forced smile, or why his lovers in general seemed less enthused right then.

"...So in other words, his only thought was to make you useful. Right then, if you'll excuse me, I got a few choice words I'd like to have with him, too."

"Erin, you promised me you were going to help me cook tonight. Where are you going with that knife?"

"Hm? … Oh, silly me, I forgot it was still in my hand~!"

"Erin, you still hadn't dropped it, please don't leave, I need you."

" _ It'll be just a few minutes~" _

_ "Eriiin…!" _

As debatable as it was of what thoughts ran through Erin's mind, Camilla and Lif watched as Erin tried to leave the kitchen with a too-perky smile and a too-concerningly-sharp knife on her supposed trip to visit Gustav, which Ryoma repeatedly tried to thwart between gentle and 'desperate' pleas to simply hugging her by the waist and not-so-subtly leading her back to him. It was clear how much Erin loved Lif and despised Gustav, but he wasn't ready for a chance of a demonstration of such when he took so much time nearly finishing in his cooking as it is. 

"Please, don't Erin. Let's just stay here for now…" As much as it was debatable how lightly Camilla was also taking all this, or how much Erin was even joking, Lif tried to take a more serious approach in coaxing Erin to give up, and she relented with a teasing "Fiiiiine…"

He knew he had so much he had to sort and fix, but for tonight, he just wanted to enjoy things while the night was still so calm and peaceful. He wanted time to appreciate the little things, even in the form of simply settling in with his lovers for the day.

He could be selfish and have that much, right? At least, he was in better spirits enough to seize that much.


End file.
